Monday, December 9, 2013

Past Days and Kept Back Opinions.

It was a very demanding weekend. I almost had a deadlock of thoughts and I admit I became moody. My room reflects the state I was in, as if Yolanda took a short visit. I got different nightmares and I even saw there how death embraced me. I don’t know if my hormone should be blamed too but whew, I am scared that day to come…

I missed a lot of activities I believe I should have blogged. I’ll try to blog and reminisce once again the different feelings that invaded my being. For a quick list, the major thing I did includes visiting a friend in a hospital, celebrating my cousins’ birthday, and preparation for my special someone’s birthday which somehow failed. Maybe the part where I finish the book “Marriage Bargain” counts too.

I’m guilty of only blogging gloomy things when I had somehow experienced good things. It’s just that once the ecstasies were gone, the mood of writing fades away with it. It’s easier to write when the fire is burning. With the hectic schedule and usually weary body, I failed to write.

Online Course
I stop taking Coursera courses. I’m enrolled in 3 courses where I should have taken 1 only. But I am interested in Java next year. However, I wonder if I can catch up with the lessons when I knew myself that I have no real experience with Java language. If I will choose 1 out of the 3 I took, I’ll choose Internet History. I’ll try to be brief here; I might as well make a separate blog about my impression with my unfinished Coursera Course. So far, my main problem is managing my schedules with the three subjects. I will be surprised later on to find that I failed to do one of the assignments that will eventually made me feel soo grieving over it. Time management combined with no real internet connection lead into my own downfall. I’m only really being resourceful with the gadgets and money that I have. It’s so pathetic I have to download the videos and sometimes go into an internet cafĂ© for this. Good thing that I got a new laptop plus my earlier tablet. Though both of it is in hiatus lately. I have to do something. Despite of all those things that happened, I still wanted to learn…

I remember the morning of the landfall of this typhoon. The morning is just normal here that the silence felt soo eerie knowing how big the typhoon is. Since I am living in northern Luzon, the effect is just minimal or none at all. By that time, I was thinking that maybe everything is just fine. But after a week, and the week that followed, I was bit shocked to see the wreckage, as if a tornado hit the town. Unfortunately, I didn’t paid attention from television broadcast. I have this feeling that I’m not really getting what I wanted to see and hear. I can’t even read newspaper during office hours. I wish I bought a newspaper though.

I wanted to personally help but I don’t know how. I want to volunteer. So far, my way of helping, though not directly, is trough this mandatory-like-voluntary purchasing a t-shirt. A salary deduction. I wonder how many employees’ salary was deducted in order for the organization/company to have a donation for the victims of Yolanda. Don’t the companies have their own savings?

I pity those children who were victims.

The first time I watched a Typhoon coverage was few days before the incident. I was in my Aunt’s house. I was awakened by the television news since I was sleeping in front of the TV in the living room. Those human cries gave me tears in my eyes for I sense their emotions. My mom said, “what are they gonna do?”.  Will the government and private organization keep on sending reliefs good forever?  It made me think. On the other hand, my own observation was these relief goods. They’re packed in a plastic bag. I hope people will learn this time but I was really disappointed with plastics. Plastics were one that aggravates our pollution and climate problems. We still can’t change our lack of disciplines so no wonder when another calamity will strike us.

We’ve been hit with super typhoons and forever we will be. Yet we are as if not prepared for it no matter how many times it strikes us. We should be advancing but we remain stagnant. How many typhoons will come before we take it seriously?

The typhoon was huge. I remember the time I saw it in television. Hindi ba nakakatakot yun? Or inaakala lang din nilang parang gaya di ng ibang typhoon? Hindi ba tayo nagkaroon ng ganun kalaking bagyo noon para hindi matakot ng sobra? I remember when I watched a film my mom bought after a tsunami from this certain country and how the Governor saved the people by releasing the dam even if it means a destruction of a very expensive project just for the lives of his people.

Lovestory in Yolanda
Kileg. Nakakatouch. Kapuso mo Jessica Soho makes a short story so beautiful or maybe more beautiful than the real story. Thumbs up for those person behind the scenes that worked hard in making every segment beautiful. The story gave me tears too. If you love the person, distance is not a hindrance and that’s what the guy did. I was touched with that gesture. However, some questions lingered in my mind like, “Is the guy that poor to ask donations?”. I have this weird feeling that something tiny is unsightly. Something is embarrassing. I cannot identify it though. Before I went into disgraceful thinking, I decided I’d better read the blog.

After reading the blog, I felt pity for other innocent victims of Yolanda. How many were in that kind of situation or in a much worst state?

Going back to the love story, isn’t it too early for the marriage? I realize it’s not actually the kind of love story that I like.  8 months of knowing each other virtually and marrying each other. I hope she doesn’t feel in debt too much and I hope the foundation is strong enough. It was indeed a whirlwind romance. I hope she fully recovers.

I’m one year younger than her.

Media is commercial.

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